Content for Wednesday, May 19
Average Person Spends Over a Hundred Bucks Each Month on their Pets
Pet ownership can come with a lot of expenses. For example, the typical pet owner spends $176 on initial supplies and adoption fees to bring their furry friend home. After that, they spend another $111 every month for their care. That adds up to a whopping $13,320 over the course of 10 years, which is the average lifespan of most dogs and cats. Meanwhile, over 45 percent of the poll actively worry that their pet might get sick or hurt. Another 33 percent worry their pet may be unhappy. Ninety percent of those polled will call their veterinarian when their pet displays some kind of odd or unusual behavior, but only 79 percent will actually schedule an appointment to visit that doctor. In fact, almost a quarter of all respondents (24%) say they don’t take their pets to the vet unless they know for sure something is wrong. Another 44 percent say they’ll research their pet’s health online when they think something’s wrong. These respondents will spend around 394 hours web browsing over the course of the average pet’s lifetime.
The Argument For Putting 'Mother' On Your Résumé
Studies show 1 in 4 mothers admit they're concerned about their colleagues' perceptions once they have children, and 1 in 5 women are nervous about telling their employers they're pregnant. In fact, 41 percent of workers believe moms are less devoted to their work than non-moms, and 38 percent judge them for needing more flexible work schedules. Katya Libin is a CEO and co-founder of HeyMama, a membership-based online community for entrepreneurial and working moms. The organization is launching a campaign to urge women to add "motherhood" to their résumés. They hope moms will post #MotherhoodOnTheResume to encourage one another, hiring managers and those who support working moms to tear down the cultural hurdles. Libin writes, "Motherhood must be recognized for what it really is: a training ground for leadership in all its forms." "Attempting to potty train a defiant toddler in a pandemic is a crash course in crisis management. Settling a dispute between two hard-headed siblings is a free — and often recurring — class in conflict resolution. Balancing the family budget, managing a slew of family members' schedules and, in the era of Covid-19, working from home while facilitating at-home e-learning, cooking and cleaning are all valuable capabilities for employees." MORE: A reported 91 percent of working Americans believe moms bring a unique set of skills to leadership roles— including being better listeners (65 percent), calmer in a crisis (51 percent), more diplomatic (47 percent) and better team players (44 percent) — and 89 percent believe they bring out the best in employees. "But because of the stigma that persists, moms need support to make this point more visibly and emphatically."
(TOPIC STARTER)... "A Mysterious Man Approaches You, Offering $1000 If You Can Make Him Laugh. What's Your Joke?"
Replies include: "how much does a chimney cost? "nothing its on the house hahahahaha..." "Three western spies were captured and put in a cell in the Soviet Union: An English spy, a French spy and an Italian spy. First they interrogate the English spy, but he refused to speak. So they tie him up and torture him for two hours until he finally gives in and tells them everything he knew. Next, they interrogate the French spy who also wouldn't speak, but after 4 hours of torture he also couldn't take anymore and told them everything he knew. Finally, they interrogate the Italian, who also wouldn't speak, so they begin to torture him. After four hours he still hasn't spoken, so they continue torturing him for hours. After enduring a full 24 hours of torture, they give up and put him back in the cell. The other two spies are amazed and ask the Italian how managed to go on for so long without speaking. The Italian replies "I would have told them everything after just one hour, but I couldn't speak because my hands were tied up." "this is my step ladder, i never knew my real one" -- "I have a stepladder, because my real ladder left when I was a kid." "What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? "People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi dooooooooooo!" "A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The nurse or whoever asks the rabbit “what’s your blood type?” “I think I’m probably a type O” "Three nuns die and go to heaven. At the gate peter is waiting for them and tells them "you have to answer a question to get into heaven." "Peter asks the first nun "Who turned water into wine?" "The first nun responds "Jesus did!" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the first nun entered heaven. "Peter then asks the second nun "Who was in a whales mouth for disobeying?" "The second nun responds "Jonah!" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the second nun entered heaven. "Peter finally asks the last nun, "What were the first words Eve said to Adam?" "The final nun while thinking about the unfair question says "oh thats a hard one" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the final nun entered heaven." "My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?" "“What’s the difference between a toilet paper and a curtain?” -“I don’t know.” -“Ah, so it was you!” "What's the difference between a BMW and a hedgehog? "A hedgehog has the pricks on the outside." "Trampolines were formerly known as Jumpolines until 1975 when your mom first used one." "Why did Barbie never get pregnant? "Because Ken came in a different box." "I once saw a man swimming in the sea, frantically waving his arms, Help! Shark help! he was shouting, ".. and I could only laugh, I knew the shark was not going to help him!" "What do you call a sleepwalking nun? "A roamin' catholic." "My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better!"
People Are Sharing the Reasons they Called Off their Weddings
Buzzfeed asked their community the reasons why they (or someone they know) called off their wedding. And they got a bunch of stories. Here are some of the highlights: 1. Sleeping with the BFF: "He hooked up with my best friend while I was sleeping next to them.....engagement was off immediately." —desireedallas 2. A break of trust: "His mom embezzled $300k from our church. My fiancé hadn’t known, but when he did find out (after his mom was fired), he didn’t tell me. I had to find out from our pastor, the week before the congregation got a letter about the whole mess. I decided he’d have that week to tell me, but he never did. In the end, it wasn’t his mom’s actions that ended the relationship, it was the fact that he couldn’t tell me about it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to trust him to be honest with me." —elizabethl4ec8eca0e 3. The not-so-nice family: "We were very happy together and have been friends since kindergarten. His family hated me and made no attempt to hide it. Some people do fine in that situation. I, however, am not one to be treated like a kicked puppy. I told him how bad it was repeatedly, but he wouldn’t do anything about it. He just said that we were fine and the way he felt was what mattered. I ultimately decided that I couldn’t marry someone who wouldn’t take up for me." —robynbrown41518 4. He wanted to still be able to have sex with another woman: "Ex told me that if I survived six months after my double organ transplant that we could get married. When I made it to a year, we talked about venues with his parents, catering, my sister bought a dress, etc. Six months after my transplant, I found out that he was cheating on me with someone from his gaming group. He said he might still marry me — but I had to let him have sex with his other woman, and I was to keep feeding him and washing his clothes. I was such a doormat that I let it go on for six months before kicking him out. I flattened his engagement ring (a cheap silver thing he won at a fair years before he met me) with a hammer." —retrocrebbon 5. The mirror reveal: "Called off my engagement within hours of being engaged on Valentine's Day. He took me out to a really fancy restaurant for lunch and booked an amazing hotel room for us to spend the night together and relax alone without our 2-month-old daughter. We get to the room, it’s still daylight, there is a dresser with a full-length mirror attached on the front. I remember thinking, Wow, that’s nice, but not really looking at it. Next thing, he’s down on one knee and I’m screaming for joy! Of course, I say yes! We obviously start having sex. As we finish and we’re lounging in bed together, the sun begins to set. As the sun sets the glare on the dresser mirror begins to diminish. Lo and behold, the silhouette of a woman’s face and boobs pressed against the mirror. He literally had sex with someone else hours before he asked to marry me!!! His excuse: 'it wasn’t me.' Later found out he had been having that affair for over a year." —jennifera4e9a4e2dd 6. The text message Christmas breakup: "Not me, but my cousin had to cancel her wedding because her fiancé dumped her. By text. On Christmas." —funnyvalentine 7. The man who didn't regret cheating: "Not me, but my mom before she married my dad was engaged to her boyfriend of seven years. Two weeks before the wedding, the guy cheated on her while drunk, and when she found out, she was upset, but she did forgive him. However, the night before the wedding, he told her that he didn't regret cheating on her because he had just been trying to live his life before he was bound to marriage. She broke it off right then and there." —zaaaaaaaaaabby 8. The meddling mom with A PLAN: "This is a long one, but it’s worth the read. I was with a guy who proposed after two months of dating. It was all so fast and I was head over heels, so when he proposed with a massive diamond, I just went for it and said yes. I had nothing to lose. He said the wedding should be as soon as possible because we were so in love, and that seemed like a valid reason. And my mom was so proud of me, I was just loving all the attention. My mom bought me the most gorgeous dress (super expensive) and my parents paid for the whole thing. I always asked him why his parents wouldn’t pay, but my parents would butt in and say they insisted, and he claimed his family was poor, which didn’t make much sense in retrospect considering the rock he proposed to me with. My parents usually weren’t big spenders, so as our wedding day got closer, I got suspicious. I got my hands on the store he bought the ring from through some careful snooping and went into the store where he bought it to see if it was real (it was!!!). The man at the store said it was one-of-a-kind and he remembered it being bought. Apparently, my fiancé didn’t buy it, my mother did! And get this, she bought it a month before my fiancé and I started dating. Then I put it all together and confronted her and my father about it. It turns out, she met him through a friend and paid him to go out on our first date (to a five-star restaurant). She paid for all of our dates and, of course, my wedding because she was so desperate for me to get married and he was just in it for the money. I had come out as bisexual about a year before all of this. I wonder if it was because she was so desperate to see me with a man and not a woman. I am now dating a wonderful woman and my mother and I no longer speak." —booklover321
People Need To Buy 124 Drinks From Their Local Bar To Make Up For Pandemic Losses
People would need to buy 124 beers from their local bar to make up for the losses suffered during the pandemic. Researchers say the number is based on the amount of money the food and beverage industry lost compared to the average cost of a beer. And for those who don’t drink, It would take each adult buying about 976 bags of chips to cover the losses.
JERK of A Guy Douses His Girlfriend With a Bucket of Urine During an Argument
A South Carolina man doused his girlfriend with a bucket of urine during an argument in the couple’s apartment. The woman said that her 61-year-old boyfriend got drunk earlier in the evening and, after returning to their residence, started an argument with her “about favors that needed to be done.” The woman said he “grabbed a bucket he uses to relieve himself with and threw it at her.” No word on why the guy urinates in a bucket, but he was arrested on a misdemeanor domestic violence charge. Myrtle Beach police said the 27-year-old victim “did have urine soaked clothing” when they showed up.
PARENTING: Mom Asks Columnist for Advice After Catching Her Son in a Compromising Position With... a Vacuum Cleaner
A woman has turned to an advice columnist to ask for help after catching her son ‘doing it’ with a vacuum cleaner: Dear Prudence, I came home early from work on Friday to the unexpected sound of the vacuum cleaner running in my 12-year-old son’s room. Thinking that perhaps this was a sign of the apocalypse—my son cleaning his room without major nagging on my part—I burst in there and caught him with his pants down and the hose attachment attached to his, well, you know. He froze like a deer in the headlights and, after picking my jaw up off the floor, I mumbled something stupid like “excuse me” and turned around and walked out and hid in my room. He left to go to his dad’s for the weekend shortly thereafter. He will be home tomorrow night after school and I don’t know what to say to him. Actually, do I have to say anything to him or can I just act as though this never happened and not say anything about it at all? (I much prefer option two, by the way.) What do you think? The columnist wrote back: Normally, I agree with you, Mom, that backing away quickly is the right path to take when stumbling upon such an uplifting scene. But I’m actually worried about the amount of suction your son could be applying to his private parts and the potential for gunking up the machine’s filter. I think this situation calls for a man-to-man talk. I hope you have the kind of relationship where you can tell your ex about this and you both can laugh. Then your son’s father can have a good-humored talk in which he explains that there are lots of ways to accomplish his goal, but it’s a good idea to keep the household appliances out of it.
Fauci Wins Webby 'Person Of The Year'
Dr. Fauci has been named Webby’s “Person of the Year.” The company says Fauci was given the honor for his efforts serving as a trusted voice during the COVID-19 pandemic, by fact-checking false coronavirus claims from former President Trump and for doing interviews with celebrities spreading information about the virus. Past Webby "Person of The Year" winners include Stephen Colbert, Louis C.K. and Frank Ocean.
UFC’s Derrick Lewis Caught Car Thief Trying To Break Into His Car And Knocked Him Out
UFC heavyweight Derrick Lewis caught a car thief trying to break into his car in Houston and knocked him out. Lewis, who shares the record for most knockouts in UFC history, revealed on Instagram he caught the man breaking into his SUX. He shared video of cops arresting a man with his head wrapped in bandages and placing him in the back of a squad car. Lewis could then be heard saying “motherf*cker tried to break into my sh*t.”
Shanna Moakler 'Filed for Divorce After Travis, Kim Kardashian ‘Affair’.. And Aubrey O’Day Once Claimed Kim and Travis Hooked Up
Shanna Moakler claims that she “caught” her ex-husband, Travis Barker, having an “affair” with Kim Kardashian while they were still married. The former Miss USA told Us Weekly that she was “never” friends with the Kardashians because, “I divorced my ex because, I saw them — I caught them having an affair.” Moakler clarified that she was speaking about Kim Kardashian who met Barker when she was Paris Hilton’s assistant in the early 2000s. The Blink-182 drummer has been dating Kim’s older sister, Kourtney Kardashian, since the end of 2020. He previously spoke about his relationship with Kim in his 2015 book, "Can I Say: Living Large, Cheating Death, and Drums, Drums, Drums". In the memoir he detailed a trip to Amsterdam with Hilton and Kim, whom he referred to as “Paris’ closet girl” on multiple occasions. Travis wrote, “I kept on secretly checking out Kim, telling Lil Chris, ‘I don’t care if she’s the closet girl, she’s f–king hot.’” He stayed in contact with her after they returned to the U.S., writing: “We went to dinner, we went to lunch. You might think I would be doing the worst things with this girl because of her tapes, but it was the exact opposite of any other encounter I’ve had with a woman: with Kim, I wanted to be nothing but a gentleman to her. It was so weird.” Travis insisted that he looked, but “never touched” Kim amid his rocky relationship with Moakler. Meantime, singer and former reality star Aubrey O’Day once claimed that Kim Kardashian used to hook up with Travis Barker. The former Danity Kane member’s story resurfaced after Barker’s ex-wife Shanna Moakler made headlines for claiming the Blink-182 drummer had an affair with Kim that led to their 2008 divorce. O’Day wrote on her Instagram Story in July 2020, “I was ‘bffs’ with Kim Kardashian during a fourth [of July]. She was hooking up with Travis Barker and we were at his house.. he was really dope." O'Day did not specify the year the relations allegedly occurred, but she continued: “Shanna his ex (who I love) supposedly was threatening to slash [Kim’s] tires (sorry girl but that was funny s–t, I would have too) so they asked her to park her car somewhere else... “we took off and went to some bs celeb Malibu parties where [Kim] desired to be photographed, and I had to run around house after house in an uncomfortable dress and high heels to appease that. She got all her photos with celebrities accomplished and we headed back to Calabasas.” Despite O’Day and Moakler’s claims, a source close to Kim says the “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” star did not have an affair with Barker. “Travis and Kim have never had a romantic relationship,” the source insisted. “They were friends who met through Paris Hilton and that is also how Kourtney and Travis were introduced.”
Topic Starters: Tell me how your summer vacation went bad?
Dax Shepard On Going Public About Drug Relapse
Dax talked with Ellen about his fear to come clean about his relapse.
Dax said, "If you can exit quarantine alive and married, my hat's off to everyone..."
Coldplay Not Allowed To Name Songs With Emojis
Chris Martin of Coldplay says they're trying "to have the first album ever with some tracks that are just called emojis" - but streaming services are taking issue with the idea.
Joe Rogan On 'Woke Culture'
Joe Rogan spoke with comedian Joe List, saying that 'woke culture' could lead to 'straight white men' not being allowed to speak.
Naomi Campbell Becomes A Mother At 50
Audrina Patridge On Dating Chris Pine, Former Co-Star Lauren Conrad
Audrina says she does not keep in contact with her former "The Hills" co-star, Lauran Conrad.
Audrina reveals she once dated Chris Pine. They broke up because he didn't like the paparazzi that was following her.